Bills, Bills, Bills is a monthly series of anonymous money diaries from theatre workers curated and edited by Jenna Clark Embrey. The full archive is available here.
editor’s note
After almost a year and a half of editing Bills, Bills, Bills, I’ve discovered that I am often at a loss for new insights to introduce each column. There’s a reason for that—in some combination, each column has showcased the main issues affecting pay equity in the theater industry: low wages and an unpredictable market. Similar to October’s diary, this month’s column brings to light central concerns over retirement savings, but also shows the long-term financial planning and care that comes with being a parent. So many of our conversations about child-rearing in theater center on small kids (parental leave, the cost of childcare, sick day coverage, postpartum workplace accommodations) but there is less attention paid to the needs of older children and how that affects parents in theater.
This contributor kept their diary in the summer of 2023. They opted to donate their honorarium, which was sent to NFTG’s default charity, the National Network of Abortion Funds.
Age: 60s
Location: New York
Position: Freelance Designer
Income: My income over the past ten years has fluctuated between $40,000 to $90,000 a year. I think $60,000 is an average and I am always hoping to bring in $5,000 a month. That’s almost the equivalent of one LORT or Off-Broadway contract. Most projects I work on expect a good degree of engagement before tech. In addition to reading, research, meetings, and drafting, there is the actual trial and error of creating new work. Some shows are easier than others. When I count it all up I probably spend 250-300 hours on each show. I just signed a contract for $6,750 which, less 10% for the agent = $6,075 divided by 250 hours means I am making less than $25/hr. About the same as the assistant designer. Fortunately, I found out after signing this contract the show will transfer netting me another $4,500 for not much additional work. But one never knows. I was also just taken off a show planned for Broadway. I don’t do twelve shows a year. Some shows are Broadway hopefuls and I get additional fees for producers to get my commitment to the project. If I teach as an adjunct I can get $6,000 a semester. I have some consulting work which brings in about $10,000 a year and occasionally I will get a commercial gig.
Monthly Expenses:
I split the following monthly expenses:
Mortgage (includes taxes): $4,160
Gas (water, heat, cooking): $175 (average)
Electric: $80. We installed solar panels which are partially funded by tax returns and incentives but soon we will need to finance and pay down the remaining $20K cost.
Mobile Phone: $215 (this includes my kid and housemate)
Internet: $40
Subscriptions: $70 (Hulu, HBO Max, etc.)
New Windows: $500
My half of these shared home expenses comes to $2,620.
Assets:
I have $9,000 in my retirement account and $5,000 in stocks.
Debt:
I currently have $40,000 of personal credit card debt which I am trying to pay down. I also have $16,000 of bank loans to pay off. About a third of that debt is for purchase of work related equipment, another third is related to renovations in my apartment and the rest is personal. There have been a lot of car expenses recently including $5,500 of repairs and I am tempted to sell it but it’s useful for visiting family and my kid at college.
Additional Notes:
I am currently helping my kid pay for college. I saved enough money for my share of year one of college but I am not sure how I will manage next year. I need to either borrow the money or have my kid take on that responsibility but I don’t want them saddled with debt.
I suppose I am considered to be “established” and have a mid-to-late career. I think I’m successful and I have gotten to work with lots of amazing artists. That’s a preamble, I suppose, to the expectation that I will need to work as long as I can—into my 80s—to survive financially.
I ended up in my field somewhat by chance by pursuing artists I wanted to collaborate with. I never studied theater or design and I never got an MFA. I probably would have ended up teaching (I still might) but that’s hard without a degree. I have traveled a lot for work and had amazing experiences. I have also often brought my kid with me at my own expense and have shared in their parenting since they were born. Gambling on what productions to invest one’s time on is a very special kind of hell for designers working on Broadway hopeful projects. The most luck I have had was receiving about $2,000 per month in royalties for about a year on a show that closed when the star was ready to move on.
The uncertainty of getting work is never easy. Even after many years I have a lot of anxiety and try to imagine myself in a full-time job. I guess I am also stubborn and I enjoy the rewards of making work that interests me. There is no real safety net. I had an inheritance four years ago and I put all of it into a down payment on a nice two-family home. I took advantage of the pandemic to look for a place and I am very lucky to have low interest rates. No bank would give me money because my income is so erratic so I asked my co-parent (my kid’s other parent, my “ex” from many years ago) if they would go in on a place with me. I would supply the down payment and legal fees and we would use their income. We are good friends who are raising a kid together. The bank agreed but demanded a 27% down payment which wiped out my savings. Now we each have an apartment in a two-family home. I’m ultimately very happy and grateful to have a nice place to live and pass on to our kid.
Sunday
This week is a bit out of the ordinary. As of a few weeks ago, a large design project for an immersive production has been put on hold. I had expected to be busy editing content I recently filmed and working with an associate. The executive producer sent everyone an email directing that we pause immediately until the show's financing is secured. I have a contract and was expecting a payment which I may never get. I had also set aside two months and expected $15,000 in future payments which I may never get.
Today I started at a Rhode Island beach community where I spent the past day with my partner’s family. After dropping her at the New Haven train station I continue on to visit my brothers in the Boston area. I stopped at a Dunkin’ Donuts and spent $9 for coffee and breakfast. I always tip about 20% so that’s included everytime I buy food at a restaurant. I fill up the gas tank costing $52 and spend $5.98 at the rest stop for a drink and snack. My brother makes dinner and we catch up.
Total: $66.98
Monday
I get up early and walk to a local coffee shop to get my steps in and buy an iced coffee for $6.30. It’s very hot today and the car’s air conditioner isn’t working well so I looked up some solutions on YouTube and went to Autozone to buy some refrigerant for $48.88. Trying not to burn myself, I gauge the coolant pressure and it seems ok but I add some more. It doesn’t make a difference so I will probably go to a mechanic when I have more money.
It’s Memorial Day and my nephew is playing a soccer match so I join their family to watch and on the way buy lunch for $16. I use Mint which is an expense tracking system from Intuit and every expense that is not cash runs through that automatically by linking my credit card and bank accounts. I check there periodically through the week to see what automatic expenses are charged. Today a monthly donation of $15 to an organization I support is deducted. I go to my second brother’s home for dinner with his family.
Total: $86.18
Tuesday
I walk to the same local coffee shop and spend $5.27. Later I have lunch at a cafe for $17.51. I worked for a while on my laptop researching and writing. I am in pre-production for a show in July which will then move in August. I will get fees for each production and today I received a wire of $1,214.41 from my agent. That’s what’s left of $2,085 after taxes and commission of a one third payment due before rehearsals. I try to pay my credit cards as soon as they come in so I pay the balance due on my Apple Card of $345.52. I also pay $139 annual payment for Amazon Prime and buy groceries for $20.21. My kid spends $7.13 on an account linked to mine for coffee. Rather than an allowance I have given them two credit cards which they use very sparingly and they also use their own checking account with money from summer jobs. Another donation goes through today for $10.53.
Total: $545.17
Wednesday
I go out for breakfast with my brother and spend $23. We say our goodbyes and I travel to pick up my kid from college. On the way I spent $15.28 for lunch and $42.22 for gas. I checked into the cheapest motel I could find and paid $92.65. It’s a place I have stayed before and is clean but without frills. I haven’t seen my kid for a few months and I have been missing them. It’s their first year away from home and in college and I’m happy and proud they have “survived” and are embracing their future with all its unknowns. We do some packing and I take them out to dinner for $76.05 at a nice restaurant. I return them to campus for a last night with friends.
Total: $249.20
Thursday
I leave the motel early and pick up my kid and the rest of their luggage. We grab coffees for the road for $10.94 and begin the drive home listening to their music. We share a lot of similar tastes and are always interested in what’s new and what’s next. On this ride that includes experimental hip hop, hyperpop, noisepop and old school jams. We talk about courses and philosophy and make our way to a roadside diner which turns out to be closed. We meander a bit more looking for brunch and end up in my hometown eating at a noodle shop that occupies the building where I had my first job over 60 years ago at a newsstand with a soda fountain and counter. I reminisce and share stories about the past with my kid. Lunch costs $41.50 and we buy treats for the road at a neighboring bakery for $8.87. A monthly donation of $5.35 is taken from my account. At home my kid cooks dinner and I catch up on emails with clients.
Total: $66.66
Friday
After being away for a few days and taking a break from work I’m feeling guilty for procrastinating and spending a few hours working online. I know this is a complex topic and tied up with cultural assumptions about work and self worth. As I age I have been trying to make more room in my life for family, friends, and general life experience that does not revolve around my career. But I still worry, especially now, about my lack of foreseeable income. I have a residency in the fall (my first!) which will be paid for. I have a big Broadway show in workshops over the next year and a large-scale ballet but that is not enough if my current production indeed falls apart. I’m thinking I need to hustle some commercial projects or teaching to make up the difference.
I’m home so I have breakfast here. I open a college statement with my kid and they log on to the financial aid account to accept scholarship awards, loans, and work-study for next year so we can plan future payments. I walk and bike to the library to return a book and then realize my phone is almost dead. I bike to Target using my Lyft account so that’s free to buy a charging cable for $14.14. I would have saved that by returning home but maybe gotten less work done. I continue onto The Center for Fiction where I have a membership which was gifted to me. At $180 a year, it’s a good bargain for a lowkey pleasant workplace. I stop for lunch which costs $20. After a few hours of work, during which I spend $6.73 online for a work-related item, I take the subway for $2.75 to the Museum of Modern Art on free entry night where I meet my kid. We return home (another $2.75) and buy take out dinner on the way for $30.48. A monthly charge of $6 for a Substack newsletter is charged to my card.
Total: $82.85
Saturday
This morning I paid $250 towards a Visa bill which is $75 over the minimum. I also paid $500 towards my Delta Amex which is sadly only $60 over the minimum. I am working at paying down all of my credit cards except one that I keep using. I buy groceries for the coming week with my kid at home which costs $149.78 from a neighborhood gourmet supermarket. I buy this with a debit card and I make it a habit to buy essentials with a debit card or cash. I always make sure to have enough cash to get me through a month although that’s not very long. I write, read and research which is something I do daily. I confirm some meetings for next week. In the evening I joined my partner and her family for dinner and bought a bottle of gin for $27.21.
Total: $929.99
Total Weekly Spending: $2,024.03