bills, bills, bills #13

a week in the life and wallet of Jenna Clark Embrey

Bills, Bills, Bills is a monthly series of anonymous money diaries from theatre workers curated and edited by Jenna Clark Embrey. (Except for this one, which was edited by Lauren and is obviously not anonymous.) The full archive is available here.

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a note from Lauren

Today is the one-year anniversary of Bills, Bills, Bills! Since last June, Jenna and I have published twelve money diaries from theatre workers across the country (and one American expat). We've shared anonymous budgets from actors, directors, designers, playwrights, grad students, critics, dramaturgs, artisans, marketers, and agency assistants. The first diary we published—from a furloughed costume shop worker in the Midwest—was the lede in the New York Times' feature on pay equity. The January column from a freelance director in NYC was the first Nothing for the Group post to hit 10,000 views.

Our columnists documented the ongoing burden of student loan and credit card debt, rising housing expenses, the endless freelance hustle, and the emotional and financial drain of caregiving. They also chronicled a constellation of advantages: extensive family support, inherited wealth, live-in partners to split costs, or residing in a country with a national healthcare system. Jenna and I started Bills, Bills, Bills to encourage open conversations about salaries—and to demystify the privileges, challenges, and barriers to pursuing and sustaining a theater career.

To celebrate, we're publishing our first non-anonymous diary—from Jenna. (A salary transparency advocate living her values!) I love Jenna's column for so many reasons. It provides the flip side of our July 2022 diary, which followed two designers in tech out of town while their arts admin-working partners wrangled the kids at home. It also presents the highest salary, individual and joint, that we've featured thus far. Despite the fact that we work with every diarist to obscure personal details, we've found that theater workers making above $80,000 are extremely reluctant to participate in this project. But if we want to advocate for equitable wages, we need to collectively know the reality of a comfortable income. What does it look like to be properly compensated for your skills and expertise, and what does it cost to support a family in an exorbitantly expensive city? 

Bills, Bills, Bills columnists receive a $50 honorarium. This month, we opted to donate that money to the Magnolia Mother’s Trust and the DC Abortion Fund.

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Note: This money diary was kept during a week in October 2022.

Age: 36
Location: New York City
Position: Literary Manager/Dramaturg at Lincoln Center Theater

Income: My base salary is $135,000 and I started my position at the beginning of August 2022. I get paid weekly, which comes out to $1,746.70 per paycheck. In my previous literary management position I made $60,000; when I moved to New York in 2012, my starting salary at the same Off-Broadway theatre was $34,000. In my current position, I get full health/dental/vision benefits at no charge to me; this also includes coverage for my daughter. (I still can’t believe it.)

My partner (we’re not legally married, which I guess is important to note for legal/financial transparency) has insurance through his union. My freelance income for the year currently sits at $50,245, and of course I will owe taxes on this next spring. I don’t anticipate taking on as much freelance work next year, but we’ll see what happens! My partner is a freelance lighting designer so his income varies hugely from year to year; prior to the pandemic he made significantly more than me, then during the theater shutdown his income was essentially zilch. For 2022, it looks like he’ll bring in about twice my salary and we have no idea what 2023 will bring. We split some costs (rent on our apartment and child-related expenses) but keep our finances and assets separate. 

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Accounts as of the end of this week:

• Checking: $10,362.44

• Savings: $22,462.24

• Child’s Savings Account: $3,518.57

• Investments: $661.14. I have some retirement savings options that I honestly haven’t looked into yet…it’s on my to-do list, I promise.

• Digit Account: $3,386.60. I use an app that siphons off small amounts from my checking account every day. The funds in there now represent about three months of savings. It’s an easy, mindless way to save. I intend to use whatever is saved up in this account to pay for my daughter’s school next year. 

Debt:

• Credit Card: $7,201.33 as of the end of this week. This amount is higher than normal because I just paid the deposit for my daughter’s tuition next year. It was $5,000, which will eventually be split with my partner, but I offered to cash flow it for now and settle it up next fall with the rest of the tuition bill. Paying the deposit now means that we can “lock in” the current rate, which increases annually, and I am sure I don’t want to move her into a new school next year. I put every expense on my credit card to maximize airline miles and pay it off in full each month, except this deposit might take an extra month or two to pay down. 

• Car: $3,600. I bought a cheap used car during the pandemic and will probably sell it in the next few months. I pay about $200/month towards this.

Monthly Bills:

• Rent: $1,897.50. This is my share of the rent for our two-bedroom apartment. Our apartment is a one-year furnished sublet, which was ideal since we had moved all of our stuff out-of-state during the pandemic and needed to find an apartment on relatively short notice last summer. 

• Electricity: Around $80 each month. I pay this and the internet for our apartment in full since my partner takes care of all the bills for the house he owns in North Carolina (where we spent most of the last 2.5 years). Gas is included in our rent.

• Internet: $67

• Cell Phone: $101. This is so stupidly high. It includes an installment plan for my current phone, and I do get HBO Max included with the plan, and then a small portion of this is for the cellular plan on my Apple Watch. 

• Pet Insurance: $120. This has steadily increased from $30 in the seven years I’ve had my dog, but I recently did the math and discovered that having pet insurance has saved me close to $5000 (my dog has had three surgeries, and a few other medical needs). Now that she’s 10 years old, I don’t see myself getting rid of the insurance anytime soon. I’d much rather budget for this monthly cost than be faced with an unexpected expense, especially because my dog is the greatest creature to have ever walked the Earth. 

• Life Insurance: $21. I have a great policy through Ethos.

• Netflix: $14.99

• Synagogue Membership: $64.63

• Student Loans: $0. I recently had the last of my student loans forgiven thanks to the Public Service Loan Forgiveness Program, as I had made 10 years of payments while working for non-profits. I’ve lost track of the total of my original loans, as I had so many cobbled together and for different parts of my education, paid off and also deferred at different times. The most I’ve ever had at one point was around $150,000. I would not recommend graduate school to aspiring theatre practitioners. 

Annual Expenses:

• Preschool: $16,500. This is my half of the $33K tuition that my partner and I split. Don’t send me hate mail about this! “I would never pay that much for daycare!” Good for you, dude! We needed to find childcare fast for my daughter and there is a school near our apartment that is an absolute dream and they had a spot. We could have spent less—the lowest price I found in our area came out to around $22,000/year—but those places have huge waitlists and some have really high staff turnover because (surprise!) cheaper daycares means lower teacher salaries. My daughter’s school pays their teachers real wages and most have been there for many years. She loves it and is happy and healthy and I don’t have debilitating anxiety when leaving her in the morning because I know she’s being well taken care of. 

• Amazon Prime: $139. As long as my kid is still in diapers, I will keep Amazon Prime. 

• Hulu: $70

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Sunday

My daughter woke up at a not-offensive time of 7AM and I make her breakfast to ward off a blood sugar meltdown. I then drag her, still in pajamas, downstairs so that we can take the dog out to pee. Taking care of a dog in tandem with a toddler is the hardest part of solo parenting while my partner is out of town. I then let my daughter play for a little bit while I attempt to drink coffee, and then I change her diaper and get her dressed. Today I am going to try something I’ve never done while solo parenting: attempt to carry her and the jogging stroller down two flights of stairs. I put my daughter in a back-pack style carrier in order to accomplish this and it works! I take her to the playground beforehand so that she’s not squirmy while I try to run. This plan backfires and she falls asleep during my run, two hours before she normally naps. I try to transfer her from the stroller into the crib post-run and it’s an epic failure that I will pay for later.

After I make us both lunch, I put my daughter back in the carrier and take the dog on a proper long walk. There’s a coffee shop with a takeout window that’s about 15 minutes away. I get a medium coffee ($3.25) and head back to the apartment, satisfied that my dog has actually gotten some steps in. Later, I put my daughter back in the carrier for the third time that day and head to the grocery store to get provisions for the week. The total comes to $90.19 and I estimate about $70 of that is kid-related food, so I will tally that and split it with my partner. We divide all kid-related expenses 50/50; I tend to make most of those purchases, but I enter both of our expenditures into an Airtable and then we settle up at the end of the month. Recently, I’ve been taking whatever amount my partner reimburses me and depositing that into my daughter’s savings account. We aren’t saving for anything in particular (I should probably start a college fund for her?), so this money will likely be put towards daycare costs next fall.

I make dinner from the groceries I just purchased, most of which my daughter rejects because I gave in to her snack demands shortly before. When she has a blood sugar crash, there is no way to reason with her. I relate to this very deeply.

After bath time and a quick FaceTime with her dad (it’s his day off from tech today which means we can easily call him, hooray!), I put her to bed and begin the epic cleanup, which I like to refer to as “resetting for the top of the show.” I put away her bath toys, her regular toys, do dishes, take out the trash, and pack her lunch for the next day. Because my daughter is only a year and a half old, packing her lunch involves cutting every piece of food into tiny bite-sized pieces. I hate it.

Once chores are done, I tackle some work emails for a bit alongside my elaborate skincare routine, then close the laptop for bed at 10:30.

Total Spending: $93.44 (will be reimbursed $35 of this)

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Monday 

Today is an unusual day because I’m working from home before going in for LCT’s annual Board of Directors dinner. This means I can pick up my daughter from school and have a couple hours with her before handing her off to a babysitter for the evening. Even though it’s raining, I take her to the playground for a bit so we can meet up with her former nanny. My daughter’s school started in September, which meant we needed temporary care for August, and we’re lucky enough that a family in our neighborhood was going on vacation and their nanny could take care of my daughter for the month. This nanny turned out to be the greatest human in the world and we all became really attached to one another, so I am really thankful to still have these playground meetups and see her!

After the playground I take my daughter to school and then head back home to work until I pick her up at 3. In this span of time I answer a ton of emails and enter scripts into my database (another elaborate Airtable) and also manage to vacuum and get dinner ready. I pick up my daughter and realize I forgot to bring a snack, so she screams all the way home. Rookie move, mom!

The babysitter (a friend of mine who is a child education specialist/ preschool teacher) arrives and I head off to work. I pay her in advance for the evening so I don’t forget later ($180). I take the subway to the theater ($2.75). It’s such a lovely event and it’s exciting to see some artists I haven’t seen in a while. I’m not used to interacting with Board members, so I challenge myself to overcome some inherent shyness. Since becoming a parent, I now understand that folks always love to talk about their kids, so that becomes an easy topic of conversation. 

It’s pouring rain when I leave, so I decide to take a very expensive Uber home ($78.93, dear god), knowing it’ll be the fastest and I can then add my babysitter’s home as the next stop (about $20 extra). My daughter is fully asleep when I arrive, so I eat a box of Annie’s cheddar bunnies before bed.

Total Spending: $281.68 (partner will reimburse me for half the cost of the babysitter and her Uber home, so $100)

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Tuesday

I manage to get my daughter fed and off to school without too much hassle. Since her school is so close to home (I am going to miss this when our sublet ends next year!), I go back to the apartment for about 20 minutes to clean and walk the dog. I also stop and get dog food (we don’t have space in our apartment for a huge bag, which unfortunately means I have to buy small bags frequently) and fruit ($39.63). I take the train ($2.75) and I’m a little late getting to the office, but not by much. I am craving a giant bucket of coffee and notice that I have enough reward “stars” in my Starbucks app to get one for free. This feels like a win.

In my office, I eat breakfast that I brought from home and then also supplement with some granola bars I find in my desk drawer. I hop on Zoom to say hi at the first rehearsal for the next show at LCT3, and then turn my attention back to some emails and phone calls. I remember that I need to Venmo three Bills, Bills, Bills contributors and am delighted when I realize I had left money in my Venmo account for just this purpose ($150, half of which will be reimbursed by Lauren, as we share the expense of BBB honorariums). I also notice that my car insurance payment ($41.03) has gone through, which feels like a bit of a waste along with the car payment itself. 

I spend a few minutes setting up future scheduled transfers to my investments. I don’t think I was investing enough before (about $200/month) so I’ve upped it to around $700. (That actually may be too much, but I want to give it a few months and see how my budget shakes out.) I harbor deep dreams of buying an apartment one day, so I want to focus on trying to save up a down payment over the next few years. Owning property feels like such an incredible, magical accomplishment. I dream about it constantly.

After reading a script and writing a few notes on it, I decide it’s lunch time. I have some “reward points” in my Dig account so I use those to shave $10 off the cost, so I spend $4.37 on a bowl of greens and grains and avocado. A meeting runs a bit long so I am panicked that I will make it to school pickup in time but the subway cooperates (again, $2.75, I haven’t been using an unlimited card these days). I make a really lame pasta dinner that my kid barely eats and we FaceTime with her dad for a little bit before I put her to bed. 

Total Spending: $240.53 ($75 reimbursed)

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Wednesday

I manage the usual morning toddler-and-dog chaos and then take the subway ($2.75) to work, where I find there are dancers rappelling/dancing on the side of the David Geffen Hall. Another typical day at the office. I spend some time emailing and chatting with co-workers, and then I head back outside to do therapy via FaceTime ($75. The therapist I see is wonderful and also relatively new to the field, so her rates are currently very low. I opt to pay directly instead of going through insurance.) Once I head back to my office, I eat breakfast that I brought from home and start reading a script. 

I have an email about a recurring charge ($9.99) from Apple, which I realize is for an AppleID I haven’t used in years. I do the math in my head about how much money I have been wasting. Argh. I manage to figure out how to cancel it without too much hassle, a far cry from that time I paid a company $50 to break up with my gym for me. (I like to avoid both conflict and New York Sports Club.) 

I have a long but productive work meeting and head back home via subway ($2.75). The train gods smile down on me and I manage to have enough time to sneak in a short run, finishing in front of my daughter’s school. We take a brief pit stop on the way home to pick up some kid’s training toilets that I am buying from another mom whose kids are done with them (I Venmo her $25, which I will split with my partner). Two friends are coming over to hang out tonight and I buy us all Mexican takeout ($94.96, a little more expensive than normal because I opted to get a bottle of the excellent pre-made margaritas to save for the weekend). My friends offer to chip in but I don’t let them because they bought the wine and came from other boroughs, and I would have spent way more on a babysitter. They leave around 10 when my kid wakes up crying, a preview of the night to come.

Total Spending: $210.45 ($12.50 to be reimbursed)

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Thursday

My daughter woke up eight million times last night and finally started to sleep deeply again at 7am…so I know our morning is screwed. It’s a mad rush to get everything done and I drop her off and rush back home to walk the dog and do dishes before getting on the train ($2.75). I brought breakfast from home and within the blink of an eye it’s 1pm and I have to leave for a reading. I realize I missed one Bills, Bills, Bills contributor that needs to be paid so I Venmo them ($50, half will be reimbursed).

I decide to walk down to Midtown from LCT and I am thankful I remembered my sunscreen for a midday application. The reading is taking place across the street from one of my favorite coffee shops that I haven’t been to in years…I go in for a coffee and what I remember to be the greatest chocolate chip cookie, only, damnit! They’ve changed bakeries. I eat it anyway ($7.56). The reading starts late because an important attendee is delayed and I start freaking out about making it to school pickup on time. Afterwards, I run out of the rehearsal space and pray the train gods ($2.75) are in my favor. I get to school just in time and get my kid and we grab dinner from a vaguely Mediterranean fast casual place ($17.15). 

One of the most intense money-anxieties that remains from my childhood is related to wasting food, which is almost impossible to avoid with a toddler. As she eats, I am doing math in my head…if there are three cups of food in the bowl, that’s 48 tablespoons, at roughly 35 cents each…so she’s just thrown $1.05 on the ground. This stresses me out so much each meal and it always makes me think of this part in Martyna Majok’s queens, where one of the characters is stuffing her clothes in a bag while recounting how many hours of work each item cost her. While my inner child is terrified of running out of food, my actual child is oblivious to this angst and I hope to keep it that way. I don’t want her growing up to be constantly worried about having enough money for clothes and food like I was, but I also want to instill in her the value of thoughtful spending. But right now she’s a toddler who likes to share her chicken with the dog.

Total Spending: $80.21 ($25 will be reimbursed)

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Friday

Our morning wasn’t a total chaos-fest today! I head into work ($2.75) and have a small snack that I brought from home and a cup of instant coffee (I keep a pack in my desk that will soon need to be replenished) and read the Broadway Briefing and Nothing for the Group. I head to the cafe next door to meet an agent from the UK for a meeting, and decide to also eat a proper breakfast during this time (coffee and yogurt + granola, which costs an astounding $11.49 but is also delicious). Another contributor has finished their Bills, Bills, Bills column so I Venmo them ($50); I am thrilled that we have basically a year’s worth of columns in the hopper now! The key will be me staying on top of editing them so it’s not a mad dash each month. 

This afternoon we have a read-through of Camelot (the culmination of a two-week workshop), followed by a run-through of Sarah Ruhl’s Becky Nurse of Salem, the latter of which I will miss because I need to pick-up my daughter. After Camelot, I make a mad dash for the train ($2.75) and it’s insanely packed. I worry I’ll encounter delays on the way home but it turns out to be fine. I get off the train with enough time to grab some dinner from the pizzeria (a chicken roll and a spinach roll, $15) and I pick up my kid and we eat dinner while watching a little bit of Sesame Street (her special Friday-only treat, gut shabbos!). After she goes to bed, I enjoy the margaritas I got on Wednesday and watch the final two episodes of Kleo. I am devastated that it’s over! Come on, season two.

Total Spending: $81.99

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Saturday

Like an idiot, I think that today is the day I will manage a toddler, dog, and coffee cup all at once. We take a long morning walk for a pastry and a big coffee ($7.75) and I proceed to spill half of it on the walk back home.

We take the train ($2.75) to Fort Greene Park to meet a toddler friend and her playwright mom, and we traipse all around the park attempting to catch a glimpse of the dog costume contest. It is a lovely excursion and both kiddos fall asleep by the end (#napfail). After another train ride ($2.75), I get a small grilled cheese ($4.50) for us to share for lunch. It becomes clear that my kid is coming down with a cold*, so I drag her to CVS for a few supplies (regular tissues and the good baby tissues that don’t hurt her face). We spend $16.84, half of which will be reimbursed by my partner.

On our way home, I see the tiny (and colorful, handmade, amazing) chair that my partner and I had been eyeing for months. I break down and just go ahead and buy it ($100) for my daughter. When it comes to unilateral/impulsive kid purchases such as these, we have an understanding that we’ll pay for it ourselves, but when my partner arrives home that evening (He’s back! After two! long! weeks!), he agrees it’s adorable and we should share the cost of it. I head out on a short run in the dark and then buy a few groceries for us to make dinner at home ($39). We enjoy our first family dinner in weeks and then I fall asleep on the couch, as the weight of two weeks of solo parenting finally catches up with me.

Total Spending: $173.59 ($58.42 reimbursed)

*This cold turned out to be RSV, which led to the most harrowing and awful two weeks of my child’s life. I am thankful to report that her toddler pal did not get sick!

Total Weekly Spending: $1,161.89 or $890.97 after reimbursements